He was despised and rejected by men,
a man of sorrows, and familiar with suffering.
Like one from whom men hide their faces
he was despised, and we esteemed him not.
But surely he took up our infirmities
surely carried our sorrows,
yet we considered him stricken by God,
smitten by him, and afflicted.
But he was pierced for our transgressions,
[he was] crushed for our iniquities;
the punishment that brings us peace today was upon him,
and because of His wounds we are healed”,
because of His wounds I am healed,
because of His wounds you are healed -
do you believe it?
This testimony is hard to write, because theres just so much I could say, but I’ll try:
I am 15. I am sitting with my back against the door to my room. The lights are off. I have been bulimic for two years, and have decided that I don’t deserve this life. I decide to slit my wrists. I am listening to my iPod, and holding the blade in my hand. I keep bringing it closer and closer, hands shaking. Then on my iPod the song “I Want My Life” by Smile Empty Soul comes on. I drop the blade, start sobbing, and spend the rest of the night in prayer.